Arguments with your girlfriend, unfortunately, are a fact of life at some point in a relationship. You'll find yourself having disagreements, sometimes over pointless or stupid things, even when the relationship seems to be going great! You'll find that sometimes tempers flare for no real reason, and arguments start for the most ridiculous reasons!
You see, "winning" doesn't really matter - if you keep getting into arguments, you lost! Is it possible to quit the bickering and get along while the relationship is still strong?
Stop Arguing with Girlfriend Tip #1 -- Will it Matter Tomorrow?
You should only argue about really important things. Is getting your way every time so critical? Because it's probably not going to happen. If you know she's got a problem with punctuality, for example, does it make sense to start bickering with her every time she shows up late? If you want to spend a few hours bickering about how she was a few minutes late, then go for it. If that's not your idea of a pleasant evening, though, just drop it.
That's not to say that nothing's worth arguing about. The fact that you're letting the small things slide doesn't mean you should sit back and give her a pass when she makes huge charges to your credit card. When such major issues come up, you have to address them right away. When something like that happens, you've got to sit down with her and address the problem directly. But if she didn't prepare the morning coffee, big deal! Drop it!
Stop Arguing with Girlfriend Tip #2 -- Share Your Feelings
It's something about men - we've got a bad habit of keeping problems to ourselves. Issues just sit and fester until suddenly there's a major problem. Adults can't deal with issues like this. For example, a lot of guys feel bad because their girlfriends never pay for anything when they go out. If this is the case with you, you've got to talk with her about it!
Your conversation needs to be calm and civilized, though, and you can't call her a miser! It may frequently be the case that behavior that makes you feel bad comes from people having different perspectives. For example, it's the custom in many places that the man pays. If, when you talk with her, you find out that this is how she was raised, you'll know that she wasn't trying to make you feel bad, but good! And you can figure out a way she can contribute without making you feel bad!
You'll find that you avoid a lot of arguments with your girlfriend if you simply sit down and have straightforward discussions with her.
Stop Arguing with Girlfriend Tip #3 -- Take a Step Back and Take it all In!
You see, it frequently happens that the specific things we argue about might not really matter much, but if you step back and analyze them, you'll see a pattern that may be instructive. Try this: analyze how the arguments start and see if there's a connection.
If your fights with your girlfriend seem to focus on one or two specific issues, you should sit down together and calmly discuss those issues. If you feel bad when she does some particular thing, tell her so in those terms - don't attack or accuse her, just tell her "I feel embarrassed when you do X." When you share your feelings with each other you gain a greater insight into each others' hearts and you'll act accordingly. Problems have a way of shrinking, and solutions become more obvious, when the two of you are sharing and working together.
Sharing your feelings with your girlfriend is a basic element of what relationships are all about. Honesty is a crucial part of your relationship. Being "right" isn't. Discuss things honestly and openly, and you'll be able to stop arguing with your girlfriend and enjoy spending time with your girlfriend.
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